Welcome Home Caleb

It was a really big night last night. For the first time, I brought Caleb home with me. I met him at Tim's and we walked back to my house. The anticipation of meeting my parents was killing both of us. The nerves and the butterflies were at full force.

As we got closer the panic and anxiety continued to swell. I don't know why either of us were so panicked. We knew that this was my parents idea and yet at the same time, the nerves were still kicking up.

We got to the door and I opened it up to let him in. We came in together, hand in hand, and he kicked off his shoes and made his way with me to the Den where my parents were already waiting.

As we walked in both of my parents stood up. Without missing a beat, Caleb signed to them, "Good Evening, how are you doing". I was so proud of him. I have been teaching him basic greetings in ASL and he told me he intended to come in and sign to them as his first act of saying hello. The look on my parents faces were priceless. I don't think they figured he was going to do that.

Instead of signing back they said good evening to him and extended a hand to shake his hand. Formalities over with we all sat down and my mom offered to get coffee etc.

My dad studied Caleb as if he were some sort of living piece of art. I think he was expecting some feminine looking/acting guy. Caleb is not that at all. He is very masculine in his mannerisms and I think my dad liked that.

With mom having returned with coffee and some of her awesome lemon pound cake, the discussion began in earnest. The rules were again discussed and the requirements of the arrangement were confirmed with everyone. A few other things were added around public displays of affection. My parents asked that we not be overly affectionate in front of them, that is, they don't want any of that face sucking going on in front of them. They simply said that they don't do that in front of me and asked that I don't do it front of them (the thought of my parents doing that at all makes me nauseas LOL). They went on to say that if we wanted to have that level of intimacy, we have a room and they are often not home and we are welcome to be affectionate with each other in that way when they are not around. The again reminded us that sleeping together at night was not an option and that they would like to keep it that way.

All in all, I think it went really well. As of Friday we are going to start moving Caleb in and by the weekend he will be a fully functioning member of our household. I still can't believe it but its really happening and I am very excited about it.

A little while ago I wrote about how upset I was with my parents and how I felt they were being a little bit over the top. I was more than mad, I was really angry with them but now I realize that they just needed time to get their bearings. They love me and they want me happy and I know that is why they are allowing this to happen. I know that seeing Caleb will be a daily reminder of how they must feel they failed me and yet I don't think they failed me at all. I realize how much they love me to allow this to happen. I tried to tell them that but sometimes the words are hard to get out. As excited as I am, I am also nervous too. I have never been this close to someone, especially another guy and at the same time it just feels so very right.

I have the strength to do anything I want and I know that I can do anything I want in life if I set my mind to it. I can beat any challenge...I believe that now which is how I know I am going to beat my Cancer.

LiveSTRONG